Sorry to say, but we have some problems with you (and your fellow-leaders).
But since we are polite people, we’ll start with some good sides of your behavior.
You are black, no merit of course, but you managed to be elected as the first black president in your country – quite a helluva job you have successfully won. We know that some Idaho people were all but happy about this fact, threatening to assassinate you and telling this publicly on telly, but your Filthy Bureau of Intimidation seems to have silenced them. Well, for once, they did a fine job. They made it possible for you to run a second time… Congratulations.
Another good side : you have an attractive, intelligent woman. Unfortunately she didn’t show up last Friday for Women’s Day (maybe we missed a broadcast?), but OK, we understand fully, she’s got a helluva job raising her children, especially that grown-up child considered to be her husband. Congratulations for having chosen such a kind woman.
But…. uh, this is all we can tell about your good sides (of course there may be hidden ones, but we can’t find them – since they are hidden). So we come to the problems.
Once you were elected, you amazed the world at a certain moment, declaring to be willing to withdraw all your nuclear weapons, and to ask your fellow nuke states to do the same. We were delighted to hear this from you. And we were not alone with this joy, you got the Nobel Peace Prize for your firm decision. You cashed the fame and the money with a big smile, but some months later you took a U-turn, and since then we never heard anything more about your initial plans. There are rumors you plan to bring them over from Europe to Asian countries, which is not the same as a total withdrawal. So we keep being worried, we ask you, we beg you, get these nukes away, dismantle the whole shebang… We will congratulate you then – sorry, not now.
We see a second problem : you drone. You drone much, you drone even much too much. Now your droning is killing people, most of them innocent people. We know that your Pentagon friends call this collateral damage – Orwellian Newspeak at its best. But you don’t damage people, you kill them. And of course, so we guess, families of these victims are not very inclined to be grateful to our country. Which results in creating more terrorists than you have killed with your droning. Moreover, we heard that recently you asked your puppet dog country (UK) for permission to start your droning from its territory, since that way you have to cover a shorter distance. We presume that when you stop droning innocent people and start helping them, really they could be a little bit more grateful, and perceive our country as the United States of Aid instead of the US of Aggression. Mr. president, we ask you, we beg you, please stop your droning. Leave the droning to that kind of big bee which we call drone, an insect far less dangerous for human beings (although a sting might be very painful). If you quit droning, we will congratulate you then – sorry, not now.
And what about nature? We see few signs of you being concerned about climate change and enviromental questions. On the contrary, many of your ‘friends’ pretend there is no climate problem, and business can go on as usual. Now you even are sympathetic to plans of drilling more oil in pristine parts of Alaska, you don’t oppose the XL-pipeline… Strange, since nature told us already some lessons this year alone : a long lasting drought which almost killed part of our agriculture, and later on, Sandy said hello to Manhattan on its way North. And it seems that snow storms are more frequent than before. Therefore, Mr. president, we ask you, we beg you, turn your head to these problems, tackle them before New York disappears into the Atlantic, before Alaska turns into a gasoline wasteland…We will congratulate you then – sorry, not now.
Still another problem.. More than 150 years after Abe proclaimed freedom for all black people, you (and your fellow black men, but also most of white people) are still a slave. You only got a new boss dictating you what to do, how to live. This new boss is pereceived now as the one percent – they order, and you have to carry out their orders. They don’t reside in your White House, they hide themselves behind walls, and they let other people do their dirty job in temples such as Wall Street – you know, that big building known as the Stock Exchange, where hundreds of humanlike beings are tied to computers, so they can give their boss that desperately wanted two figure rate. Well, ordinary people suffer from this greed, they live in poverty, they have to work for wages not sufficient to make weekends meet, they can’t afford medical care… But when they go protesting, you send your police forces on them, forces which don’t excel precisely in humanitarian feelings. Therefore, Mr. president, we ask you, we beg you, come up with good plans to put an end to this anti-human situation, and most of all, carry them out. We will congratulate you then – sorry, not now.
There are still some minors problems, but we won’t discuss them here, we guess they can be handled once the major problems are solved.
That’s all we have to say today, Mr. president.
Association of People Against State Aggression (APASA)